Inmates’s Loss
Inmates’s Loss

Inmates’s Loss

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Death of a loved one:

There is no greater loss then a loved one. But when an inmate losses someone and can not say goodbye it is even harder on them than it is us.  I have a friend that wasn’t able to hug his sister who is dying of cancer and only has a day or two left. He was able to see her for two hours.  This inmae has been in solitary confinement for years. After getting out he is struggling with his sister dying and being on a a regular yard.

Prison system:

Usually prisons do not allow visits or phone calls or furlooughs when a loved has passed.  When a loved one has passed the family will call the Chaplin at the prison to inform them of the family member that has passed and then they inform the inmate. If the family member is able to visit before passing then they can have one visit. In this case this inmate was able to visit however, he was not able to hug his sister at all to say good-bye. The guards forbid any personal contact which in this case was a terrible mistake that the inmate will have to live with for the rest of his life.   His sister was the last living relative he had besides his children.


How do inmates cope with losing family members? They do not get to go to their funerals, or their wakes. Inmates do not get to say a proper good-bye, they do not get to celebrate someone’s life and they do not get grieve like most people because the other inmates will take that as a sign of weakness and take advantage of that. Prison is not a place to grieve. Prison is difficult enough without having to go through losing someone. And the Guards certaintly do not make it any easier when you lose someone especially when they do not allow you to hug the person that is dying. It is necessary for both the inmate and the person that is dying to have that hug and that one last good-bye.  After all it is the last time that they will  ever see each other.


I keep going to changes and what needs to change. I hope one day trainging will be provided for the guards. And that prisons will change on how inmates are treated. They are human beings and they are paying for their crimes already. They do not need anymore punishment because a bunch a guards want to or feel the need to have a ” better that you’ or ” power trip” becuase you’re in prison and you need more punishment attitude. It does not do anyone any good to have that outlook, it only does more harm than good. It causes more PTSD and then can cause more issues later on.


What are you thoughts?

If you have a story I would love to heear about it.. Your email will not be used and kept private.


  1. Moma

    That’s just not!!! I would have just hugged my sister and taken whatever punishment. That’s my sister who was dying and if that’s the last time I was ever going to see it would have been worth it.

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